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It is sometimes hard for me to retain a realistic outlook when I have a tendency to default to utter optimism and hope. It sometimes displays my extreme naivete, but what can I say? After all, you can take a girl out of the suburbs, but you can't get that overly-protective, sheltered and safe upbringing off of the girl! At the urging of emails and comments posted here, I have decided to take some control in my guy situation and back off for awhile. The worst case scenario is that if I miss him that bad, I can just watch some of those videos we took on my site. LOL. He is just lucky I felt so comfortable to do some of that stuff with him and gave him access to me in so many ways. I had set aside these photos to surprise him with on his birthday, but my flatmate suggested I send them in. As she put it, he doesn't deserve them! And here I was prepared to use them as a means to entice him into some of my fantasies about sex in a skirt. My flatmate likes to tease me that she knows what I'm doing when I return home wearing a skirt or dress, then immediately lock myself in my room for a spell. What can I say? The problem with feeling like such a dork and being so easily embarassed is that when my only response is blushing, it means that I can't deny it!
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My Lover, yes my lovers because I am married But my husband does not fulfill at all, so my boy friend 20 Years older than me is whom really is growing me all over sex, BERA, Mexico, April 2004 Needy full of lust wanting someone Anyone hold me feel me I lie awake here my mind drifting slowly The velvet of a tongue runs over my naked self teasing here and there, touching not only my flesh but my soul. Sensations rush through me ones so pleasurable Yet so close to pain. It fulfills me but for a moment only. What happens when it's gone? This Moment? Will I once again be alone in darkness in my own self-pity? The sensations escalate higher and higher. Pleasure or pain? It's hard to decipher. Hands everywhere inside and out. Hard and soft, Fast and, slow... am I fulfilled or empty? It’s all the same Our voices grow louder or is it just mine? Ecstasy consumes me. An explosion... Then silence, as I am once again alone my phantom lover gone, feeling empty bitterly I smile For a moment I had it, The thing they call love, even lust Yes for a moment I had it, a climax, an end!
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